David LaRock
Published: February 22, 2006
Valentine’s Day is over which means two things: A) Hallmark and local flower shops are counting their income and B) many couples celebrated the ‘Holiday for Relationships’ together or some couples just started relationships themselves. Either way, the most important factor in starting a relationship is not the dozen roses, the perfect pick-up line, or even the Brad Pitt figure.
It is what’s not being said that is the deciding factor in being single or alone.
According to a study done at the University of Southern California in Santa Cruz, non-verbal language communicates about 50 percent of what is being said, while words themselves contribute just 7 percent. Voice tone and pitch contributes around 38 percent.
Helpguide.org, a project of the Rotary Club of Santa Monica & Center for Healthy Aging, states that behavior, not words, makes those we care for feel cared for.
We can control our nonverbal signals by understanding what exactly we are sending: eye contact, facial expression, tone of voice, posture, touch and even your timing can influence the underlying message you are sending.
Nonverbal communication isn’t just for romance and love.
In the workplace, what you say can mean the difference between that bonus check and the classifieds.
Maria Colbert, a professor of Communication Arts at the University of West Florida, said nonverbal communication extends further than simple facial expressions.
“People think that nonverbal communication just pertains to facial expression, but that is not the only thing that nonverbal communication entails.ÿ Nonverbal communication also extends to body movements, gestures, the use of touch, etc.ÿ Since the workplace has become so diverse, the use of nonverbal communication becomes more critical as we want to make sure that we are not offending anyone or to make sure we are acting in an appropriate manner.”
Whether you’re going on a first date or first job interview, remember your mother’s advice and put a twist to it, “If you don’t have anything nice to say.at least smile and listen.”