By Arren Joseph-White
Ah, Valentine’s Day—A day where partners flock to the stores to prove they actually love their partners and spend copious amounts of money to make a point. Obviously, views on the holiday have changed as time has progressed. The rise of social media and a general change in culture mean that consumerism and its ties to love and Valentine’s Day have shaped things. These days, if you aren’t paying attention, you can be sucked into the web of candies, flowers, and overdramatic dinner reservations without realizing it. It’s an almost overbearing battle of overconsumption and excessive spending on things that will be thrown away in just a few months, or even weeks. Dinner reservations that will be forgotten or cards and candies that will go in the trash. What I am trying to say is the whole holiday has become not about showing affection, but about buying as much as possible and showing off.
Before getting into personal opinions, a disclaimer is in order. This does not criticize the act of gift-giving, for that, in particular, is a perfectly valid way of expressing affection for someone. I am critical of the corporate push to buy as much as possible, and those not aware of their contributions to this subject. People can show affection however they please. If your act of affection is gift-giving and you do it with intention, there is no issue. Now, with that said, what exactly is the reason for the dislike of this holiday?
My personal qualms with the holiday (single status aside) all come from the fact that these days, it’s not about love. It’s about aesthetics. It’s how your overpriced bouquet will look on your Instagram page, what the tacky balloons look like on your TikTok account. Our world is mostly made up of things meant to be discarded; clothes, trends, the list goes on. The same thing goes for Valentine’s Day. It’s about the cards, the candies, the stuffed bears, and none of it has any meaning. Most people end up buying things because they are roped in by guilt or obligation for their significant other.
It’s also now a holiday of competition; who can get the most extravagant gift and an elaborately planned day. Whose partner is the greatest, and who is the most worthy of love (even if just for a single day). And if you’re single during the holiday, it’s a completely different ballpark. You are almost given the idea that you aren’t worthy of the culture. And the only way to be is if you decide to spend money on yourself; not a terrible idea, but one that still contributes to the trash heap.
Statistics over the years certainly back up the fact that the holiday isn’t about love anymore; it’s about money. According to Capital One Shopping Research, in 2025, an estimated $27.5 billion was spent in America for Valentine’s Day. The average American will spend almost $200 total on the holiday (most of it being on candy and jewelry), and while inflation has helped to bring down spending, the money is still being spent. With Valentine’s Day being the 5th largest spending holiday, it shows that it doesn’t need to be full of meaningless overspending.
But the kicker is this: excessive buying and spending isn’t needed. You can show how much you care for someone, and you can do it any day of the year. Yes, you can spend money on gifts for holidays (I am no stranger to the idea), but the best way to show you care isn’t by racking up hundreds of dollars worth of items that will eventually be discarded, it’s shown by action and attention. Getting things for not just partners, but friends and family. While it is perfectly fine to participate in the holiday, getting wrapped up in it for the sake of guilt, external factors, or proving a point creates the problem. Doing it for the sake and mere aesthetics of it instead of genuine happiness or actually showing you care adds to the landfill of discarded teddy bears and half-eaten chocolates.
In the end, it’s important to be aware of the patterns of consumerism. Every holiday, each trend; it all comes down to the idea put into our heads that everything needs to be bought. My dislike for the holiday doesn’t come from a hate of romance, but a hate for the idea that love must be bought. To break the cycle, come up with ideas that can be made or used more than once. And be aware of the pattern; capitalism thrives on the mindless spending of consumers. Valentine’s Day has had changing origins, but be aware that this holiday (like any other) does not need to be about how much money goes into things; it’s how much thought and heart go into your relationships.
